How To Have a Successful Casual Hookup

May 15, 2023

Where my singles at

Where are my singles at?

Sure, wanting to have sex with no strings attached has always been a thing, but openly searching for it is way less taboo than it was even a generation ago. Casual hookups have become way more accessible, with access to an endless stream of dating apps in the palm of your hand. The hardest part of the casual hookup is finding the right person. It’s never as easy as you fantasize about. With so many dating sites and apps to choose from, it's hard to land on the platform that is the best option for you for a night of safe fun. Don’t lose heart!

Remember, there's nothing wrong with prioritizing the search for a hookup and your pleasure. Besides, bringing that honesty to casual sex can help reduce pressure.

So when seeking a similarly minded hookup partner (or two), a “dating” app that’s purely for hookups will be king. It’s basically the horny person's key to sexy instant gratification. Conveniently, most dating apps can be used for hookups these days. So which app you decide to use to find your casual fling really just depends on how much you'd like to know about the person.

Where my singles at couple together

Keep It Light

How much you want to know about your hookup partner is completely up to you.

There are no rules- apart from what makes you comfortable. A good hookup can be ongoing or it could be a one-night stand. You can absolutely keep things as anonymous as taking a nameless person home from a bar, but there's also nothing wrong with making sure that the person you are considering doesn't have the world's worst sense of humor! Plus, getting along well with a hookup, even if you're not looking for anything serious or exclusive, can help if you are looking for a regular friends-with-benefits situation.

What makes a good hookup app?

Where my singles at online dating

Though many of these apps make it obvious that people are looking for casual hookups, visitors to more generalized dating apps can avoid a lot of drama if they were upfront about their intentions within the first few DMs. Many apps even include an option to let people know what you're looking for on your profile, so your intentions can be clear from the start without any confusion.

Unless you’re also looking for a relationship, you'll want to skip any apps that include a long questionnaire about romance and future families or require expensive subscriptions. These are really intended for people who want long-term relationships. However, you should choose an app that has plenty of space to show what you're looking for and some of your own personality. Photos are also an important factor in good hookup apps. Some apps and dating sites hide people's pics unless you have a paid subscription, and that’s a huge bummer. Not just for physical attraction reasons, but for safety reasons! Apps that show the complete view of someone's profile are the safest way to go.


What are some popular options?







Definitely known as a hookup app, but some folks do seem to find long term partners on there.



Ideal for quick hookups and sharing digital steamy time with strangers.



Specifically for gay men, one of the few mainstream apps available.



Really thorough free version with lots of questions and space to create a profile.



The app literally meant to help you find a relationship.



Only app specifically geared towards non-monogamous people and folks looking for threesomes.



Huge user base but really intended for dating.



How to not be a jerk when participating in casual sex

Where my singles at outdoor date
  • Be prepared. Meaning condoms, lube, etc.
  • Keep it light but honest with your expectations.
  • Don’t linger. Leave when the hookup is over.
  • Don’t make it weird. Treat people the way you’d want to be treated.
  • Know your STI status and get tested frequently.
  • Respect you and your hookup partners' boundaries. No means no, always.

 Most of all, have fun!


 Carly S. (@Makeupandsin) is the Queen of Wands, pleasure educator, porn star, model, blogger of Dildo or Dildont, and a bad bitch from the Bronx. Nominated for Xbiz Sexpert of the year 2023, She’s managed and been the featured educator of some of NYC’s award-winning sex toy stores. You may have seen her teach at Exxxotica, Cycles and Sex, Sex Expo, read her work in Cosmopolitan, glamour, shape, or heard her on countless podcasts. 

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